beating jealousy in the industry
Welcome to Meet Me at the Barre!
Having friends who are in the entertainment industry is crucial to your mental health. It’s important that you surround yourself with people who understand what your life is like and the choices you need to make in order to be successful. However, having these friends might lead to competition and jealousy.
This week, I’m going to talk about feeling jealous when your friend books the gig and how to cope with it.
Firstly, I want to start out by saying that jealousy is completely normal and it’s okay to feel this way. What is NOT okay is acting maliciously upon those emotions and taking your anger out on your friends. Ninety-nine per cent of the time, casting decisions are completely out of you and your friend’s hands so getting mad at them is useless.
This not only applies to when they have booked the job but also when your friend receives a callback, makes it through the cut at an audition or even if they get an official slot for an audition and you did not. No matter what situation you find yourself in, keep all of this advice in mind.
So you’re in a situation where your friend has gotten something you didn’t and now you’re left feeling many emotions. Sadness, anger, frustration, but the green monster, envy, will come in like a wrecking ball. The energy from this confusing time is stirring inside you, what do you do?
Well, the first thing you do is congratulate them! After all, you’re friends. You’re not going to want to but this is so important in taming your jealousy. Give them a big hug, say “good job”, and head somewhere that makes you feel happy and safe.
Now, reflect. Think about what went wrong and what went right. Did you take every step necessary to be as prepared as possible for the audition? Did you send your submission email with everything casting asked for? Did you perform to the best of your abilities in the audition? If the answer to any of these questions is no, then it’s time to get to work.
Make a list of things you think you could have done differently and get going. Use what you’re feeling to really dig yourself into your work. Go to the studio more than usual. Double check your submission before sending it off. Take every step you possibke to be the best you can be for the next audition.
Life doesn’t stop just because your friend now has an opportunity. Use this as a push in the right direction and learn from your mistakes.
Remind yourself that things happen for a reason. Trust that things will play out the way they’re meant to and keep living your life. It’s important to keep working and honing your craft but there’s only so much you can do. Again, most casting decisions are out of your hands.
Sit back and trust that your work and dedication will speak for itself.
And if it doesn’t?
You move on, focus on the next audition you have, and do the best you can.
Finally, be happy for your friend and support them! Go see the show they booked, or wish them good luck in the audition. Yes, we are all performers and we’re competing for the same spots in the same shows, but we are human.
Kindness goes a very long way in the industry, and when your friend inevitably finds themselves in the same situation you are in right now, they’ll remember how supportive you were, and return that kindness when you get the next one.
Hold your friends close and cherish them. Finding good people is very rare and your true friends will wish nothing but good things for you. A good support system will make all of the difference when trying to figure out this crazy industry.
How do you cope with jealousy in competitively driven industry? Let us know in the comments below!
Thanks for joining me this week and see you next time!
Xoxo
Penelope
